Former BIGBANG member T.O.P. speaks out in a recent interview about his departure from the band.
He spoke with Korean media outlets for the first time in 11 years, opening up about his former teammates. When asked about his thoughts on joining the members for a comeback, he stated, “I do imagine it a lot,” but that would not be possible due to the “guilt” he’s feeling regarding his past controversial actions. “Honestly, I just carry a life-long sense of guilt. I left because I felt I had no right to stay. All I feel is that I’m just deeply sorry,” he said.
T.O.P. mentioned that he made a difficult decision to leave the group because it was unbearable to think that his mistakes and the consequences of his actions would hurt the other members.
While he confirmed that he’s not in touch with the BIGBANG members, he mentioned that he still keeps up with the group’s activities through their content.
Looking back on his issues in his thirties, when he suffered from “intense shame and self-contempt,” he commented that those years felt like “lost time.”
“I found healing through creating music, and I want to share that music with others,” the actor stated.
He stated that he aspires to live as a responsible and stable man, just like any other young person in Korea as he approaches 40.
“I plan to focus on maintaining a balanced diet, exercising regularly, and fostering positive thoughts. I want to live a life where, when I wake up in the morning, there are no negative articles about me on the news portals,” he added.
Making their debut in August 2006, BIGBANG became a global K-pop phenomenon with hits including “Bang Bang Bang,” “Haru Haru,” and “Lies.” However, following the departure of scandal-plagued member Seungri in 2019 and T.O.P. in 2023, the group took a hiatus.
After being found guilty of marijuana use in July 2017, he received a sentence of 10 months in prison and a two-year suspension from his mandatory military service.
Just recently, T.O.P. made his ‘controversial’ comeback to acting in Squid Game Season 2 as Player 230, ‘Thanos.’
“The offer to play Thanos was a daunting proposition. The character mirrored my past, reflecting aspects I’d rather keep hidden. The fear of being pigeonholed into one role made me hesitate. But destiny seemed to be pulling me in this direction,” he stated.
T.O.P. expressed that, as an actor, it is his “duty to repay the trust” placed in him, adding that excelling in his performance is another “important task” in his life.
The idol-turned-actor expressed that his primary goal is to establish a “stable and less dramatic life.”
I want to reach a point where I can wake up without being bombarded by negative news and feel more at peace,” he stated.
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