For Filipinos, commuting is a daily struggle due to the traffic congestion and underdeveloped public transportation which remains as one of the many problems the country has yet to solve. It gets even worse with faulty policies that only put the burden on commuters instead of alleviating their daily plight.
This is why a video of the “Salmon Cannon” that has gone viral online is making people wish there is one like it for humans.
— Cheddar (@cheddar) August 7, 2019
In the video shared by Cheddar on Twitter, moving fish between bodies of water is now easier and faster as they go through a flexible, pressurized tube that safely transport them over dams. The environment-friendly device called Whooshh Fish Transport System or “Salmon Cannon” was developed by Whooshh Innovations in order to help migratory fish like salmon who are struggling to get around hydroelectric dams. It can also be used for fish rescue or invasive species removal.
Aside from acknowledging the potential of this breakthrough for salmon and other fish, people (who are clearly deprived of efficient transportation system and want to be sucked into the tubular void) are now expressing their desire to travel by fish tube.
good morning yeet me through the fish tube
— JuanPa (@jpbrammer) August 11, 2019
We. Demand. To. Ride. The Fish Tube.
— Ariel Dumas (@ArielDumas) August 11, 2019
launch me through the fish tube so i can feel something.
— mark hoppus.🏳️🌈 (@markhoppus) August 11, 2019
stick my disgusting body into that fish tube and fire me into the goddamned sun!!! let’s GO
— matt lubchansky (@Lubchansky) August 11, 2019
I am a:
🔘 being launched through the fish tube
— Roxi Horror 💀🌸 (@roxiqt) August 11, 2019
*coldplay “fix you” voice* let me ride………..the fish tube
— bb ghost (@emilywithcurls) August 12, 2019
As it becomes the newest meme online, people now relate to the fish tube on an emotional level.
I took the fish tube less traveled by. And that has made all the difference.
— Morgan Murphy (@morgan_murphy) August 12, 2019
*extreme katy perry voice*
do you ever feel like a fuckin fish in a plastic tube launching over a dam
— Admiral Snaccbar 🐙 (@SimplySnaccbar) August 12, 2019
PITCH: Millennials are obsessed with the fish tube because it offers salmon the kind of purposeful direction and security that we as a generation have never known pic.twitter.com/6apxktGLXw
— Stephanie Soh (@steph_soh) August 12, 2019
We are all just helpless fish zooming through this tube called life
— Jules (@Julian_Epp) August 12, 2019
Others have different ideas for this technological innovation.
fish tubes but for skipping stages of grief
— Alyssa Limperis (@alyssalimp) August 11, 2019
[First day working at the fish tube]
"Can I fuck the tu…"
— Fred Delicious (@Fred_Delicious) August 12, 2019
Some are even reimagining what the fish inside the tube might have gone through.
the salmon going through the giant fish tube: pic.twitter.com/UtIC7EKuc6
— Paul McCallion (@OrangePaulp) August 11, 2019
Fixed the audio for you. pic.twitter.com/YvvTm9WEcb
— Tuft e. Cake (@Tuftecake) August 11, 2019
The Fish (to his peers): You will NOT believe what just happened to me…
Other Fish: Sky Tube?
Fish: I swam through a sky tu- whut?
Other Fish: We know. It's weird.
— Shane Roth (@apexnerd) August 11, 2019
Naturally, some people want a human-sized version of the fish tube and make Futurama’s “transport tubes” a reality.
someone make a gofundme for a human-sized version of the fish tube please
— Parker Molloy (@ParkerMolloy) August 11, 2019
But people were quick to dismiss the idea since we don’t have dorsal fins, which acts as a stabilizer, and allows fish like salmon to travel through the tube.
everyone wants to get sucked up into the fish tube but none of you have the powerful dorsal muscles that allow the salmon to travel through it.
you would simply get stuck and die — understand this.
— Mona Lisa Overbite (@SoberedByBricks) August 11, 2019
Still, the fish tube (more than just a desirable transportation system for humans) could help save the lives many fish species and restore balance in ecosystems. Meanwhile, here in the Philippines, our fish need to have proof to claim their nationality and our fishermen can’t fish in our oceans. Would it be worth trying if we can use the fish tube to “remove invasive species” here in our country?