Are backhanded compliments the norm for today’s love language? Because we seem to have missed the memo.
Cooking is always considered as a good way for people to show their love and affection for others. But apparently, even that has become a way for people to crack jokes as well. In a post in the Facebook group “What’s your ulam pare?,” a Facebook user posted photos of dishes that his wife of 4 months had cooked for them.
Each of the food looked delicious and and made with love, but the caption that accompanied the post didn’t sit too well with a lot of fellow “What’s your ulam pare?” members. “Ilan sa mga lutong ulam ni misis sa apat na buwan namin bilang mag-asawa. Yung iba di malaman yung lasa, may sobrang alat, may mukang masarap pero hindi, importante nakakain pa rin naman 😂 [Some of the dishes my wife cooked in our four months as a married couple. Some have indistinct flavors, some are excessively salty, some look delicious but aren’t, but the important thing is they are still edible].”
As of writing, the reactions have reached the 2.5k mark, with 1k comments. Most of the comments were calling out OP for their unkind remarks towards their wife and were chiding him for how he had humiliated his wife in public.
OP then made another post on the group over 19 hours ago (as of writing), to which people made comments ranging from referring to OP as a “red flag,” a “clout chaser,” and also said, “eto ba yung pinahiya yung asawa sa isang post? 🤫 [Is this the one who humiliated his wife in a post?].”
Here’s a question for OP, why resort to asking online strangers for their reactions when you could just talk with your wife about your concerns about her cooking? Is there a need listed on “Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs” that is necessary to be filled by the internet? Was looking to the internet for some sort of validation more of a need than communicating with your wife?
Well, apparently, that’s what OP did—posted on a Facebook group where foodies share their thoughts about food and cooking, and did the unthinkable: honored his wife for her cooking while embarrassing her about it in the same breath. We don’t know if she’s aware of it, or if they had both talked about it before posting.
But one thing remains clear—no one should ever do that to their significant other. Nobody should even dare to humiliate them or subject them to public shame for their cooking. As if a person’s cooking skills can’t be improved over time.
And, if OP had so much to say about his wife’s cooking, why not do the cooking himself? Surely, he can do the cooking and the cleaning as much as his wife and the other women in his life do. He talked as if making all of that food didn’t take time and energy out of their wife’s day. To be honest, cooking in itself is already a taxing task when you’re living alone, what more if you’re feeding a family or in the culinary industry?
No one should ever be shamed by the people they love, let alone their significant others in public as a joke. It’s demeaning, and quite literally, one of the worst feelings to ever feel. No one deserves to be treated like a joke, and people need to remember that in order to be better in the future.
Update: The post on “What’s Your Ulam, Pare” is no longer accessible.
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