There’s a popular saying that no man is an island, but sometimes, a person just needs a moment for themselves, a chance to enjoy their own company.
With the constant hurdles of life, taking time to be alone can offer a moment of peace. More than just a break from the noise, solo dates also can be a way to slow down, appreciate the little things and foster self discovery without outside influence.
College student Jayenne Avin Gutierrez told POP! that solo dates prompts her to focus on her wellbeing. “It’s kind of a way for me to prioritize myself and love myself more,” she said.
Meanwhile, Roxan Aira Domingo, also known as Woxy Wanders from TikTok, created her own series titled “100 Solo Dates,” where she documents her solo activities. She explained that solo dating encompasses any activity a person chooses to pursue on their own.
“Nagsulat ako ng 100 solo date [ideas] tapos binubunot ko siya,” Domingo said, referring to how she puts in an “element of surprise” to make her videos even more engaging.
The series consisted of individual activities that she personalized and are inspired by Filipino culture, such as eating street food and volunteering.
This resonates for young adults like Gutierrez, where she was inspired by social media posts about going out for solo dates. “I want to try [these activities] with a friend sana. Kaso [at] that time, parang lahat ng friends ko [ay] busy. I feel like I need to learn how to be alone, to gala on my own,” she recalled.
For Gutierrez, cafe hopping is her favorite pastime and collecting photobooth pictures of herself during alone time.
Taking yourself on a date gives you the opportunity to appreciate your own company and do things on your own. According to Domingo, doing solo activities makes her feel independent.
“Because you can just solely depend on yourself,” she said in Filipino. In this way, for her, she’s free to do whatever she likes on her own terms during her alone time.
Gutierrez added that these activities can improve someone’s confidence, make them step out of their comfort zone, and develop their character as they navigate doing and accomplishing things individually.
In addition, it helps you discover aspects of yourself that often go unnoticed when in the presence of others.
Most people have divided responses whenever someone is seen dining out alone or enjoying their own company. However, some people or onlookers tend to interpret such instances as “lonesome” or sometimes depicting someone as friendless.
“It reflects not the person na tinitingnan nila, kundi yung sarili nila,” Domingo expressed, noting that such behavior is a reflection of the observer’s own nature rather than the subject being observed.
“Hindi mo naman kailangan yung presence ng iba to make you feel loved [or to] to make you feel complete. You just need yourself,” Gutierrez said.
Although doing things alone can feel awkward—especially in public—Domingo noted that most people are “fixated” on their own lives that you should just go ahead and do your own thing.
Simple activities like a solo date can make a person’s day, offering a chance to recuperate from the demands of everyday life.
“[Solo dates romanticizes my] life in a way. [Ito] ‘yung parang reward ko to myself after doing a good job,” Gutierrez said, adding that no matter the circumstances, she would treat herself on a date.
Going out might seem expensive and time-consuming by traditional standards, but a meaningful solo date doesn’t have to break the bank to make it meaningful. “Solo dates don’t have to be expensive,” Gutierrez added.
It can be a grocery date, going alone in a mall, doing errands or even the mundane and simple moments that fits each and everyone’s personal definition of what an alone time is for them. It’s the little things that make the moment worthwhile.
Other POP! stories that you might like:
‘Forgotten Island’ scene sparks a proudly Filipino reaction online
