You’ve probably heard of English pop singer-songwriter Dua Lipa, a.k.a the savior of the everyone tempted by the idea of getting back together with their exes. She created a set of “New Rules” and uses it to remind people to stay away from getting in touch with their old lovers.
And all this time she was right to warn us because a research suggests that being friends with an ex partner may be a sign of psychopathic tendencies.
Yes, if your ex wants you to stay friends or “keep in touch” with each other, you might be better off saying “Hell no!” because chances are they have psychopathic tendencies. Researchers at Oakland University studied the post-relationship friendships of 861 respondents and gave them questionnaires to determine narcissistic and psychopathic qualities.
Results suggested that those who showed dark personality traits were more likely to keep their exes around as friends. They purposefully keep them because they provide convenience with “easy-access” to resources such as sex, money, or information. They also thought that it was the more “practical” thing to do for them than cutting ties.
Generally, a psychopath possess what psychologists call the “Dark Triad” traits which include: psychopathy, narcissism, sadism, and Machiavellianism. And while anyone can show characteristics such as selfishness, what sets a psychopath apart is their complete lack of empathy — a sign that their actions are purely self-motivated and for their pleasure.
This might not mean that if you’re friends with your ex, you’re automatically considered as a psychopath. But if you know that they’ve been having selfish motives or had a history of keeping ex lovers as friends for convenience, you might want to reconsider your choices.
So if your ex is trying to reach out to you, you might need to remember all the rules.
Don’t let the teachings of dear lord savior Dua Lipa go to waste.
— LA Imani Rowe (@ArchLorraine) November 10, 2017